American Idol 7 - Audition Episode 6 - 1/30/08

Tonight’s audition episode is from Miami. I found it just a bit cheesy to try and imitate the “Miami Vice” opening; they changed the AI logo and used some of the same edited shots including the pink flamingos. Outside of a few of us older viewers I couldn’t image many catching that obscure pop culture reference.

In Miami we are told over 10,000 people auditioned but only 17 received the coveted golden ticket, this is two less then Omaha making it the lowest number audition city to date. After listening to some of the contestants I understand completely.

I also found it cheesy to have the stadium people singing “The Rhythm is going to Get You”. I really need to be on the production staff.

Our first contestant is Shannon McGough who can seriously belch, she hasn’t found a man who could beat her, and unfortunately we had to see way too many examples! Poor Shannon has to work with her parents in their meat market and she dreams of getting out of there. Shannon you see has won lots of singing contests and her parents have the pictures and awards to prove it. I hated her outfit.

Shannon chooses “Cry Baby” and pretty much butchers the song. It should be noted Shannon wasn’t singing but rather shouting and not very good. She also had these weird modulations and only god knows what key she was singing because there was no melody. Simon advises her that he had a late night and she didn’t make him feel any better. I couldn’t understand a word you said, she tries to sing something else and he advises her it sounds like you are eating. He threw in some type of Hungarian reference I didn’t really catch. Randy indicates he couldn’t hear any melody. Paula indicates she has a nice tone to her voice (how could she tell) but there was a melody problem. It is a no. Shannon is completely shocked and another contestant who doesn’t take rejection well. She goes off and off and off. Clearly her parents are enablers because they too were shocked because she can sing. Shannon advises us she is done with American Idol and tells the audience they shouldn’t watch the show anymore.

Next up is Robbie Carrico, a former member of a boy-band (unnamed or at least I didn’t hear what it was) yet Robbie has morphed into being a rocker. I definitely wouldn’t classify him as a rocker, he did have long hair but the song he chose to audition with was not a rocker song in my book. I didn’t catch the title. Robbie was good, there was a nice tone to his voice and thankfully he was in tune, no pitch problems here. Simon indicates you are quite good and says yes. Randy indicates he has a nice voice, kinda cool and says yes as well. Paula says something about how she could feel him (scary) but says yes. Robbie is going to Hollywood.

We are then presented with a montage of incredibly bad male contestants.

Chaleb Ehachah was up next. Chaleb is from Venezuela and he does have a thick accent. We learn he is a singer musician who can play the guitar, piano and harmonica. He describes his style as gypsy music and indicates he has great passion. Once again I didn’t recognize the song he sang nor could I understand a word he was saying. I don’t think it was very good and he had several pitch issues. Simon states I would like you if I was drunk but sober it doesn’t work and votes no. Paula likes the tone of his voice (she liked more than that) but feels his strong accent will work against him. Simon presses her for a definitive answer and Paula pipes up with now you know what I have to deal with, she gets up and turns her back. Randy says yes based on his voice. It comes down to Paula and she says yes. Chaleb is heading to Hollywood. The ending of this clip was great as Simon holds up Paula’s Coca-cola cup and asks someone to check out the contents.

Best friends Corliss Smith and Brittany Wescott, both 20, and are plus size women arty out next. They tell everyone they are sisters because they have so much in common except for the type of men they like, Brittany goes for the skinny type while Corliss goes for the bigger guys. Ryan wonders if they just came to the auditions to find boyfriends since we get so much footage of them with various men.

Our best friends have to audition together and we get so much flirting from the girls towards Simon and Randy. Simon indicates he has never seen Randy smile so much. Simon wants to hear them separately and asks Corliss to sing just to Randy so he and Paula move over. Corliss chooses “Take Five”. To my utter surprise she was damn good; I really thought we were getting some train wrecks. She needs some training but Corliss has some raw talent. She could enunciate and she was in key. Brittany goes with “My Guy” and Brittany is definitely the better of the two. She has power, great tone, and was very articulate. There was lots of joy in the audition room and both women get yeses from all the judges. There are hugs for the judges from Brittany and Corliss. If there was a diabetic in the room at the time they would have gone into shock with all the sugar flowing.

Reader alert it is yet another sob story audition. Suzanne Tune explains she is 21; she had attended a performance art school and was in several musicals but had to take time off. She got pregnant when she was 18 and gave birth to Madison. She was in a relationship at the time and initially Madison’s father stuck around but ended up leaving them which is why she is a single mom, yada, yada, yada! Suzanne is very excited about the opportunity American Idol could provide her.

Suzanne chooses “I Can’t make you Love Me”. I wasn’t really impressed but her voice was okay but she had quite a few pitch problems. Paula liked the sultriness of her voice, it was sexy. Simon indicates she got more attractive as she sang and Randy indicates there was seduction but she needs to watch the pitch and the melody. She gets a yes from all the judges.

The producers rolled out footage of Jasmine Trias from Season 3 and it brought back so many horrible memories I was getting nauseous and my first thought was Jasmine was going to be there live. How exciting to hear she has had such success, her album went platinum in the Philippines – and I should care why?

The footage was just lead in for Ramiele Malubay who indicates she wants to be the first Asian American Idol, Jasmine Trias went so far in the competition so why can’t she. Ramiele chooses “Natural Woman” and in my opinion did okay but I wasn’t thrilled. I don’t think she started in the right key but she rallied for an okay ending. I could at least hear the melody. Paula indicates she has a fine voice, phenomenal and says yes. Simon thinks she is a good singer but for a hotel not a contemporary artist and says no. Randy is impressed with her big voice and also votes yes so Ramiele is on her way to Hollywood and her chance for the coveted title of American Idol. My prediction is she won’t make it to the top 24!

Sob stories number two. Syesha Mercado is next. She loves her dad but there have been problems, her dad has a drug and alcohol problem so he was in and out of her life but finally sought help and just graduated from a rehabilitation program. Dad is at the audition with her and he is so proud of his daughter, he loves, wants the best. Syesha is very proud of her dad as well. Syesha chooses “Think”. Syesha shouted more then she sang but there was a nice tone to her voice when I could hear the melody, she has potential but I am not sure she is ready. Paula indicates she is fantastic and votes yes. Randy indicates she lost it at the end but it was a good effort, felt she was the best out of Florida so far and votes yes. Simon just says yes. Syesha is going to Hollywood. I certainly didn’t hear what the judges were hearing. I guess I am really jaded about this stuff now.

We then get two quick auditions. We heard Natasha Black sing a verse of “At Last” and I have to say she gave me chills, it was pure magic, and her voice was fantastic. She gets yeses from all the judges.

Ilsy Lorena Pinot (I have to rant about this name, what the &*^% were her parents thinking!) is shown briefly singing “Unfaithful” and gets a yes from all three judges.

We then get a montage of 4 horrible singers (at least they were brief) including Ben Haarsbach, Caray Banthea, Grant Rhea (Simon tells Grant he thought he should be wearing a dress) and Fabienne Hyppolite. They were incredibly bad. Once again with the strange names.

Richard Valles gets way too much air time for one who sings like crap. Richard goes with “God Bless the Broken Road” and this was one of my fingers down the chalkboard moments. He sounded really, really bad, it was so nasally. Randy tells him you sound like you are singing out of your noise and demonstrates to him how he sounded. Richard goes home without a golden ticket.

Julie Dubela is next and surprises Ryan with the news she was a contestant on American Juniors 4 years ago when she was 12. We gets lots of clips from a show which was a disaster from the very beginning and aired after the disastrous Season 3 of American Idol (there has never been a poorer showing of a top 12 group then that one). Julie is clearly a teenager including their poor way of communicating thanks to texting and the whole me, me, me it is all about me! Julie tells us music is her life, her dream, she is not a quitter and she doesn’t believe in mediocrity. If I was a praying man I would have prayed to be saved from this contestant.

Julie goes with “Me and Bobby McGee” and Janis Joplin rolled over in her grave. Julie’s performance was over the top and not in a good way. She was bad with a Capital B, scary! This performance was another finger down the chalkboard moment. Simon advises it was way over rehearsed. He asks her if she has ever been called precocious and she responds by asking “What does it mean?” Randy indicates her voice was not on point and she is not ready yet. Julie being the typical teenager can’t keep her mouth shut and tries to sing something else and talks back as if the judges were parents, I wanted to slap her. They advise her to stop acting for the camera. Paula tells her she should be an actress. Julie gets three no’s. We then get lots of footage of her pouting and complaining. She was asked to sing at a Red Sox Game and she said no for the audition. Julie continues rattling on about not acting. Give it a break Julie, if the show continues for the next 4 years which is how much longer the principles are signed for she will have plenty of chances to audition, she doesn’t reach the maximum age limit for 12 years!

Our final contestant after two days in Miami is Brandon Black. Too much time was spent on this disaster. Brandon energetically bounces into the audition room with a ridiculous wig and some attempt at a comedic introduction with some strange voices of characters talking to each other. Then off with the wig for the audition. Brandon chooses “I’ll Make Love to you” and Paula has a second stalker. It was a train-wreck. Brandon then launches into his own composition titled “I’m the Next American Idol”, which was a total waste of time. Simon breaks in and advises him the audition was verging on desperation, he didn’t like any of it, the wig, the horrible dialogue and the weird singing but Brandon won’t shut up. Simon and Randy get up and leave with Randy shouting you will never, never, never be going to Hollywood. Paula is uncomfortable and says goodbye.

We are then presented with a montage of the good and the bad.

Next Tuesday the auditions take us to Ryan’s home town of Atlanta. Until next week!