American Idol 7 - Audition Episode 7 - 2/5/08

American Idol is visiting Atlanta for the 4th time. We are told over 12,000 people came to audition. In prior seasons American Idol has found Clay Aiken, Jennifer Hudson and Fantasia.

Since Atlanta is Ryan’s hometown we were given the opportunity to meet his Dad and Mom. How cute? In case you didn’t catch it that was sarcasm.

Once again I thought it was way too cheesy to open the show with the background music of “The Devil Went Down to Georgia”.

The first contestant is Joshua Jones. Joshua is 26 and works with glass and he loves it. By the way it was also cheesy to be playing “Walking on Broken Glass” during the montage of Joshua’s back story. Joshua chooses “Don’t Stop Me Now”. I actually liked his voice and his movements weren’t distracting to me as much as the judges. Simon stopped him and told him that he had weird eyes, it was slightly demonic. Paula indicates his voice is good but the eye movements are distracting. They ask him to try again without the eye movements but after starting they stop him because he is doing it again.

I was actually stunned because they gave him a third try and told him to turn his back so he was singing to the background image. I was laughing my head off and Simon asks could you imagine him singing like that at the finale? It was funny with Josh singing and dancing with his back to the judges but I will give him credit, he had a nice voice. I don’t think he could win though. Simon indicates it was too karaoke but apologized for the eye comment but it did bother him. Simon says no. Paula says yes and Randy votes yes as well so Joshua is on his way to Hollywood. As he is leaving he shows that taped to the back of his contestant number was four, four leaf clovers taped to the back.

JP Tjelmano (sp) is next. JP indicates he auditioned once before during Season 4 and Carrie Underwood was two positions behind him. They were audition buddies. He regrets not keeping in touch (that was just way too pathetic not to mention doubtful that Carrie would even remember him, I didn’t remember him and I watch this show like a hawk). I was chuckling to myself when he told us that people say he has star quality and there would be contestants later saying they were two positions behind JP! There was no doubt right then and there we were headed for a train wreck and the people in his life are enablers!

JP chooses a Rascal Flatts’ song, I couldn’t understand him and I have all of the Rascal Flatts albums and I didn’t recognize the song. This should give you a clue as to how horrible JP was. He was totally flat (no pun intended) and he did not have one ounce of performance skills and his dance movements were beyond horrid. JP was like a stick in the mud. Put me out of my misery now! Simon told him to get a clue, you were that bad, and my pen has more charisma then you do. Simon votes no, Randy says no, and Paula indicates you are a really nice person but I have to pass.

We are then presented with a montage of Paula who is Miss wishy washy. The entire montage was played with the tune of “I’m Just a Girl who can’t say no” in the background. The montage was clearly clips from multiple seasons because Paula had multiple outfit and hairdos. We won’t talk about how the song was totally inappropriate for the producer’s purpose. The meaning of the song in the show “Okalahoma” carries a different connotation and given the past allegations of an affair with a contestant I was just plain laughing at the song. This was just a waste of air time.

Get out the Kleenex dear readers because we have SOB STORY number one from tonight’s episode. Asia Epperson is a good ole country girl, her family doesn’t have a lot of money and she worked hard for the money (okay I couldn’t resist inserting song title here) to come to Atlanta. Before leaving to come to Atlanta she called her dad to say she was on her way to audition and very shortly afterward she gets a call from her brother advising her that their dad was in an automobile accident and was killed. Don’t call me heartless because I understand her pain but somehow she managed to continue to the audition which means the rest of her family has to put the funeral on hold, etc. Can we say selfish with a capital S! She is still young enough to audition again. She knows her dad is with her today for the audition.

Asia advises the judges she was going to sing something different but her dad died a couple of days ago so she has decided to sing “How do I Live” in his honor. Is that shameless pandering for sympathy or what? I believe Asia has a nice voice but it was fairly scratchy, but there appeared to be a clear tone. She was a bit pitchy and she totally lost it at the end. Simon indicates he likes her, it was a tough situation but she did well. Your dad would be proud of you. Simon votes yes. Paula is totally emotional and states you are very brave, your passion came through and she votes yes. Randy said you worked it out, brilliant and votes yes. Asia is going to Hollywood. Paula then totally loses it and has to get up and leave. I must be getting a cold heart because I wasn’t moved at all by this story. It just made me mad.

Next up is Brooke Helvie, our Miss South Florida Fair (trust me I am not kidding here) all pageant like with her crown. She loves Simon and she wants to prove him wrong that those performing in pageant’s can actually perform since he is always calling something as pageantry. Brooke goes with “Who’s Loving You”. I personally didn’t like it, it was okay, her voice didn’t annoy me but Brooke certainly did and I don’t even know why. Simon states it wasn’t bad and says yes. Brooke tells Simon she loves him and he says “I know.” Paula says yes and Randy indicates you have a good pop voice and votes yes. I don’t agree and would suspect she won't make it to the top 24. Brooke hugs everyone before leaving with her golden ticket.

Next up is another montage of bad contestants all trying to sing “Glamorous” by Fergie. They definitely weren’t glamorous either in dress or talent.

Eva Miller is the next contestant and Eva has ATTITUDE or at least she says she does. She absolutely loves Simon. Eva goes with “A Thousand Miles” and her performance was like a thousand miles of bad, bad, bad. Eva’s number fell off and the poor thing slipped and fell on it. I didn’t want to laugh but I did. The judges were arguing with her that the whole thing was an act but according to Eva looking in Simon’s eyes it was an accident, she wanted her dancing to entertain. Her dancing wouldn’t entertain anyone. Once again Eva must live in a world of enablers because she pleads with the judges that many people tell her how wonderful she is but when pressed with which people it came down to family, friends and her church choir, PLEASE! The judges advise Eva it is a no but she tells Simon she still loves him; however, when leaving she had something else to say, bleeped of course on what she really thought!

Alexandra Washington, 16 is next. We spend more time visiting with her 93 year old grandmother who is hanging around then Alexandra herself, which was okay with me. Alexandra goes with “My Funny Valentine”, interesting choice and she doesn’t suck but she didn’t impress me. I certainly wouldn’t spend money on her. It was okay. We get 3 quick yeses from the judges and Alexandra is heading to Hollywood.

Next is another montage of some bad, geeky male singers.

Nathan Hite also 16 and he proudly announces he is repeating the ninth grade. Nathan advises he is ready for any Simon comments because he has his own winning retorts. He will not come crying out of the audition room. Nathan chooses a song I don’t know and it is probably best because he butchered whatever he was singing and if it is a song I like I don’t want it ruined for me. It wasn’t a fingernail down the chalkboard moment but it came close. Simon tells him it was a bedroom audition, like you were alone in your bedroom singing along to the record (and what is wrong with that, I do it all the time) but not as good. Nathan starts with his cute retorts and Simon tells him does he want to listen or be a smart ass, he chooses to listen. After he finishes Simon tells him he can respond and he does. I hate to say it but Nathan’s retorts were actually funny, that portion was entertaining. I would say Nathan could be a stand up comedian. Luckily for all of us it was a no. I also laughed when Nathan was talking to Ryan afterwards and explains Simon said no because he refused to spoon with him.

Amanda Overmeyer was next. Ms. Gothic Harley riding home health care nurse! I am not sure I would want Amanda helping me at home at least from a nursing perspective. Amanda is going for the rocker chick audition. She chooses “Mean Woman” and she does have a nice growl to her voice but to me this was a bedroom audition, she was totally trying to channel Janis Joplin. The judges ask her to sing something different and she goes with “Traveling Band”. This performance made me sit up and pay attention. It was so much better, it was more natural, and her tone was really good. I think if Amanda can remain herself and not imitate others she could be successful. Paula calls her authentic, real. Both Randy and Simon say yes. After she leaves Paula says she is the female Chris Daughtry.

Next is a montage of the good and we are told the golden tickets were flying out the door.

Our final contestant of the evening is Josiah Leming. Josiah is now 18 but he left home 18 months ago when he was 17 quitting school. He mother was very disappointed. He now travels around playing and singing. He goes wherever the wind blows. Josiah lives out of his car but proudly indicates he is not homeless, his car is his home and he loves it. We get a tour of the car. He does break down and indicate sometimes it is scary and lonely but he knows that someday it will all be worth it. He came from nothing and can’t believe the opportunity he is being given. His family thinks he has been staying with friends but will now learn the truth.

I do have a heart; I have to confess this is the first story which has absolutely moved me. It brought tears to my eyes. The reason I believe this above any of the rest so far this season moved me is because Josiah was completely sincere. It was not an act. He is truly an honest person, how unusual.

Josiah is asked by the judges why he is there and he tells them he has ambition and the motivation to win. I totally believed him and it goes back to his sincerity. I note Simon tells him he believes what he is saying. Josiah goes with an original composition, “To Run”. I was very much impressed. I totally loved the song itself and I thought Josiah had a very nice presence and tone to his voice. Simon and Randy found his accent strange, like it was British, I didn’t hear it. Josiah does indicate he listens to a lot of English bands. Simon asks him to sing “Chasing Cars” which he did with relative ease having not rehearsed. I liked it. Simon again comments on the weird accent. Randy indicates he likes him, he is interesting but would see him in a band; Paula finds him intriguing, I adore you and she says he is holding back on what talent he really has. The judges give him a unanimous yes. Josiah is going to Hollywood and as he is leaving he tells them you will never regret this decision. I am human because that brought tears to my eyes as well.

Only 20 people out of 12,000 received golden tickets in Atlanta.

Tonight we have a wrap up/montage show called “Hollywood or Bust.” According to the American Idol website, this is the best of the best. I really can’t believe it, I suspect it is a montage of the good, the bad, and the truly ugly but time will tell.

Until tomorrow!