AI 9 2-24-10 Elimination Round 1 - The Guys

Last night the women took the stage while tonight it is your job to separate the men from the boys. The guys will be battling it out live for your votes America. This is …”Simon stop talking”.

I literally was laughing because I think this was the first time in nine seasons Ryan did not say ‘American Idol’. After the opening, Ryan said something about being able to hear everything Simon was saying.

We have to move to judges and listen to some useless banter. If we spent less time with the judges, we might have more time to allow the contestants to sing. This is after all a f*^king singing contest!

Let us just get to dish shall we.

Todrick Hall – “Since U Been Gone”

WTF was hanging from Todrick’s pants, it looks like the back of a coonskin cap, give me a break. I was shaking my head in horror when they indicated Todrick would be singing Kelly Clarkson. Really, do these contestants not pay attention to the rules? Never and I repeat never try to outperform a prior Idol’s song, it is usually the kiss of death. I thought this performance was idiotic. I do not understand and cannot appreciate the whole hip-hop rap talking. This arrangement changes the melody too much and it demonstrates Todrick has a weak lower range. I might be able to give Todrick some credit for his risk but if you sing like crap, you lose my vote.

Ellen – this is what she is looking for (really?). She likes Todrick’s dancer stage presence. The chorus was rough but she liked everything else.

Randy – I am a fan, you have mad talent, this did not sound like the same song, you obliterated the melody, and you can sing but do not go over the top.

Kara – I agree you are a strong singer but you need to change the song naturally. I appreciate you took a risk but you need to pull back next time.

Simon – you came over as a dancer trying to sing rather than a singer who can dance. I am all for risks which are improvements but you murdered the original song to the point where it was verging on stupid. (It was not verging on it was stupid).

Aaron Kelly – “Here Comes Goodbye”

This kid looks young or perhaps I am just older then I think. I thought Aaron picked a very good song, which displayed his vocals very well. There was some pitch problems during the chorus but this improved by the end of the number. While Aaron clearly has some good vocal chops, he has zero charisma and performance skills. The poor kid just stood there singing with his feet stuck to the floor, knees bent, and was swaying back and forth to the point I was becoming nauseated. Aaron really needs to have some performance lessons and with his vocal talent, he could really rock this competition.

Simon – this was quite a good performance but you looked embarrassed to be there. You are a good singer, likeable, cute but you need to take control. You will 100 percent be here next week.

Kara – you are my favorite kind of contestant because you have no idea the raw natural talent you have. This competition will help you get better every week with the feedback. I like the pop-country lane you are taking. Great job.

Randy – this is a big song and you have a big voice. There were a couple of pitchy moments but I am a big fan. You need to believe in yourself.

Ellen – Ditto what everyone said. I believe you will be here a long time and I love how humble you are.

Jermaine Sellers – “Get Here”

I thought this was a very solid mess of a performance. Jermaine has a nice voice but he so went over the top trying to prove it he failed miserably. The pitch was on and off so much it is surprising he remembered what song he was singing. I also feel he put too many riffs into the performance as well. When he was trying to belt, he was pushing too hard and it fell flat. My other problem is there was no emotion in the performance. He was not selling the song but rather trying to sell his excess vocalizing.

Ellen – I am a huge fan of your look and I love this song, however, she feels he was not feeling the lyrics. You were pushing a little too much.

Randy – this was a weird song choice and you did too much vocally to a melody that already works. Pull it back.

Kara – I know you wanted to show what you could do but you have to make the runs feel meaningful.

Simon – this is the kind of song fifty something’s would request in a piano bar (being one of those fifty some things I certainly would not). It sounded as if you were screaming the song and you have totally blown your opportunity.

Tim Urban – “Apologize”

Ryan teases us about the big phone call Tim got telling him he was in yet we still learn nothing about why he was out and then in. I would also like to know if the judges made the decision or the producers. I digress. I cannot believe Tim would be foolish enough to select this song only a year after Kris Allen blew America and the judges away with his version. Tim is an idiot and probably blew his chance given this was a complete vocal mess. The entire vocal felt disconnected from the music and when Tim reached for the falsetto, he fell flat and sounded awful. This was simply a very bad performance. I could feel his nerves at the beginning given the deer in the headlight look but kid please get it together.

Simon – Congratulations for being brought back but I believe we made the right decision the first time. There was nothing to take from those weak vocals.

Kara – the music overpowered you, your acoustic performance was more organic. I like you. You are cute and current.

Randy – I think you chose the wrong song because you do not have the falsetto for it. No part of the performance worked.

Ellen – it is a good idea to choose a popular song but you could not hit the high notes. You are adorable though.

Joe Munoz – “You and I Both”

I like this song but given how horrible Joe’s enunciation was I could not understand a word he was saying which is sad. The beginning of the song demonstrates his voice has some strength and a nice tone. Clearly, nerves overcame him because as he went on there was no support for his voice causing a loose vibrato. As a whole, I did not like the performance.

Ellen – You looked comfortable, demonstrates good stage presence, and sounded good (excuse me).

Randy – You have a great voice but this was not a perfect song choice but you worked it out.

Kara – I would never have thought of this song for you. In terms of singing you were the best of the night because of consistently (are you kidding?).

Simon – I rather agree with Kara. It was okay, safe, and forgettable. You did not make us believe you were a star.

Tyler Grady – “American Woman”

Good heavens this was a train wreck. I notice poor Mr. Grady was playing at a rock star and just has to pick up that damn mike stand, give me a break. The beginning actually sounded good but when the band kicked in the performance became sloppy and his voice just was not good.

Simon – People will remember this performance but for all the wrong reasons. This came over as someone at rock-n-roll fantasy school. It was all a big cliché.

Kara – Your Jim Morrison obsession is not working because you are not adding anything to the original.

Randy – this was style over substance.

Ellen – You are copying your idol without any charisma.

Lee Dewyze – “Chasing Cars”

The beginning of the song was the best and I enjoyed the nice rock vibe but then everything fell apart. Lee was consistently out of tune and I did not like the liberties he took with the melody. The arrangement was off. Lee does play guitar fairly well though.

Ellen – This was a good song choice except he was screaming. There was something off about it. I love the tone of your voice.

Randy – I disagree with Ellen. I am a fan of your voice but I did not like the song, it was too rangy for a hard rock song and did not work for me.

Kara – You made the song unrecognizable.

Simon – I disagree with Randy and Kara because this was the best of the night by a mile (are you drinking?). You are a naturally good singer.

John Park – “God Bless the Child”

I laughed aloud when I heard the song choice. I adore this song and have a copy of Billie Holiday singing this jazz standard and Liza Minnelli has a kick ass version as well. This is 2010 John and if you were trying to be a pop star, a more current song would have been better. The beginning of this song was very rough but there was some improvement towards the end but overall it was a mess.

Simon – You need an incredible voice for that song and you were very flat with zero emotion. It was a pointless performance.

Kara – I agree with Simon. You have a big voice but there was no connection. It was loungy and sleepy at times and it did not tell me what your lane is.

Randy – I heard some good parts but the song made you feel old.

Ellen – I do not think young girls will vote for you because of that song but I liked the performance.

Michael Lynche (Big Mike) – “This Love”

I like “Big Mike” but this performance was not impressive. I enjoyed the arrangement and Mike’s guitar playing but his singing was off. There were many pitch issues throughout. While “Big Mike” has excessive energy and he was having fun, he needs to pay more attention to proper vocal techniques if he wants to advance. In addition, open your eyes once in awhile if you want to connect with the audience.

Ellen – I think this was a great song choice. There were pitch problems but it does not matter because of his personality.

Randy – I agree with Ellen your energy is gregarious but picking me up during the top 24 decision really hurt.

Kara – This was good but not outrageously great.

Simon – You were a support act before the main act. You are a big guy with a big heart but you gave very little delivery.

Alex Lambert – “A Wonderful World”

There is a nice tone to Alex’s voice but this performance was a mess. I thought Alex looked very uncomfortable on the stage and the entire performance was like a bad high school talent show.

Simon – This was the most uncomfortable performance of the night. You have a naturally good voice but it was not on display tonight.

Kara – I want to give you a hug. You sound like James Morrison, which is both a problem and a compliment. You have a rich tone. You really need to believe in yourself.

Randy – I like your tone but you did not pull it together.

Ellen – You are adorable and have a great voice.

Casey James – “Heaven”

I think this was the best performance of both nights. This was just a pure natural and beautiful rendition of the song. The arrangement was excellent and he provided a heartfelt performance. My only irritation was the judges, their antics during his performance bordered on obnoxious.

Kara – I did not recognize you with your shirt on (Really?). You were pitchy in the chorus.

Ellen – I found it hard to hear you because she could feel Kara undressing Casey but you sounded great.

Randy – I understand where you are coming from since we are both models (give me a freaking break). I like your voice and I like you but not in that way.

Simon – I can understand how it is to be cursed with good looks (just slit my throat). I think you chose the right song, you are real, likeable and this was your best performance ever.

Andrew Garcia – “Sugar We’re going down”

This performance was good but not great. Andrew was in and out of tune consistently through the song. This just did not go anywhere. I found the song choice to be weird.

Simon – I was looking forward to hearing you the most but in the end, you disappointed me. This performance was too serious and indulgent. It was not original enough.

Kara – This was a strange rendition of the song.

Randy – The arrangement was strange but I am still a fan.

Ellen – your early performances should carry you through

Well it was another evening of uninspired song choices, crumbling due to nerves and some poor singing techniques. Several contestants have the potential but they need to step up their game.

After the last two nights, this is turning out potentially to be the most disappointing season of American Idol since season three. I still have nightmares about Jasmine Trias let alone John Stevens.

As with the women, the guys have disappointed me and outside of Aaron, Casey, “Big Mike”, and Andrew I would send the rest home.

The absolute worst performances were Jermaine and Todrick so they are my choice for elimination.