AI 9 3-31-10 Now There are Nine

Last night Ronald was doing both his happy dance (Didi is heading home) but also shaking his head after watching what has to be the number 1 most uncomfortable results shows ever aired in nine seasons.

The elimination show WENT INTO OVERTIME! WTF is wrong with this picture. I have such fond memories of those wonderful half-hour results show from the first few seasons.

Last night was all about selling, making money and cross promotions. The opening video combination of American Idol and “Clash of the Titans” was over the top and one of the most ridiculous ideas of convincing people they should rush to an opening of a movie I think I have ever witnessed. Unleash the Kraken indeed!

One bright spot of the evening is there was no group number.

The Ford Commercial was mediocre at best. They are pushing the bottom of the barrel to pull out “Kung Fu Fighting” from 1974. I have to admit I own a 45 version of the song, which demonstrates the age of the song even more.

The interviews of the contestants, the scathing comments from the judges, and the palpable anger between Simon and Ryan was just freaking uncomfortable. The whole thing seemed so “Mean Girls” high school social group fighting. I wanted to go screaming from the room.

I did though crack up with Simon’s line “This is not The Oprah Winfrey Show. It is called American Idol.” Perhaps we should call in Dr. Phil to do some counseling with the American Idol team.

Ruben Studdard returned to the Idol stage with a song so boring I started nodding off. Ruben still has a voice but as I indicated multiple times during Season two he has issues with controlling his breathing. Wait Ruben has new songs coming out which we will be able to download and he will be touring with Clay Aiken this summer. There is an artist hawking their wares on the results show well I never saw that one coming.

We can now blame Usher for unleashing Justin Bieber onto the world’s stage. My public service warning announcement to all – “Justin will be singing next Wednesday during the elimination show” so watch at your own peril.

Let us move on to our mentor’s performance. Was it just me or did it seem we were watching a routine from “So You Think You can Dance”. There definitely was more dancing than singing. I am not sure there was any singing going on at all with all the techno echoing effects in place. It appeared to be an effective lip-sync drag show routine. RuPaul would have been happy with the routine. I personally found it to be just ear noise because I certainly did not hear any musicality.

Diddy’s band is “Dirty Money” now I understand; however, if that track is music then I am scared for the future. Dancing over singing along with all that technology trying to make music was painful. Poor Mr. Diddy was having trouble lip-synching. Time waster to try to sell an upcoming album just never happens on American Idol.

My predictions for the bottom 3 this week were spot on and my plot to use reserve psychology has now worked two weeks in a row. Goodbye Didi!

For all the hype there was this year about the women we only have three left in the top nine.

Next week our top nine will tackle the Lennon/McCartney songbook. “Imagine” the possibilities of the potential train wrecks we may have in our future.

Until next week…